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If Making Money Online Was a 9-5 Job

October 11, 2007 Posted under: Making Money Online by Caroline Middlebrook

Having escaped the clutches of the 9-5 just three weeks ago I am really loving the freedom that I have to work for myself. But my family and friends still have 9-5 jobs and tell me their woes. This got me thinking, if making money online was an actual 9-5 job that people did, imagine the horrors that could come from your boss’ mouth…

Monday

Jim’s off sick so you’re down for increasing PageRank today. We’re at 3 at the moment, I think 5 is doable. Thanks for stepping in.

Tuesday

I’ve noticed that our sausage making blog is bringing in over a thousand new RSS subscribers every month now. Good job! Shame it took you two years to figure it out. Anyway, we’re going to bring in some University students to create some more blogs so can you write up some notes for them today so they can do the same? Excellent.

Wednesday

George in sales gave me the August report that showed that 40% of our sales come from our email list. Well I had an idea - I figure, if we’re currently emailing out to our list every day, why not just email them 10 times per day, that way we can get a 10-fold increase in profits! Sort that out for me. You’re a STAR!

Thursday

Have you heard about this website called Digg? It’s a real hit and apparently it sends 20k visitors with every submission. We’re changing our policies as a result. All new pages will be submitted to Digg from now on. Implement that and oh, and if there are any more sites like that, add them to the list will you? Super.

Friday

The new client that we took on wants to rank for the keyword “hairy bottoms” but unfortunately none of his 723 pages rank for it. Didn’t you get number #1 on Google for a keyword last week? Brilliant work! I told the client that it was a BIG JOB - I figured I’d work in some slack time so I’ve allocated you TWO whole weeks!

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13 Comments:

Kmi Fleming Meridian
October 12, 2007

Hi Caroline,

…and that’s not counting the overtime hours or taking work home with you!

Second read and I’m still laughing!

Kim

Financial Hack
October 12, 2007

lol…yes, it would not be pretty. I defintely don’t miss those type of requests in my former real world job. The key with having the freedom, however, is that you need to self motivate yourself when you reach those points where you don’t feel like doing anything. Still, it’s 1000 times better than working for someone else…

Marco Richter
October 12, 2007

Caroline, that´s so funny. How do you know, what´s going on at my workplace? :-)
This is exactly what happens every day and every week at the office, which I still have to visit on a daily basis.

Caroline Middlebrook
October 12, 2007

@Kim, hmm I’m working way more hours now then I did in my day job :/

@Financial Hack, Yes this is very true but I think its easier to motivate yourself when you have realistic goals that you know can be met.

@Marco, oh dear, that kinda sucks!

Marco Richter
October 12, 2007

It can be somewhat funny sometimes when you have a “head of marketing” who really knows marketing but tends to describe the Internet as “something working with electricity invented by eBay”

Brian
October 12, 2007

That’s a cute list, Caroline. Keep up the good work!

Michelle
October 12, 2007

A v brave move to give up the 9-5 and concentrate on the online making money gigs. And it certainly does show in your blog articles - as they are always polished and informative!

But don’t you miss the office environment? Just a teensy bit???

Caroline Middlebrook
October 12, 2007

@Marco, Lol!

@Michelle, The only thing I miss is the cakes when it’s somebody’s birthday :-) I like being at home, I like being alone, I love the freedom, so no I don’t miss it in the slightest.

Andy Roberts
October 12, 2007

I love working from home now as well, and when I come to a grinding halt which is usually in the afternoons, I don’t bother trying to motivate myself because the quality of that work time isn’t worth it. I take a long break and go out, then maybe work until late in the evening.

I did used to get the kind of requests above sent to me by email, or even worse Skype, but I’ve dumped those people now.

The only thing I miss occasionally is the enforced thinking time on the commuter train.

Caroline Middlebrook
October 12, 2007

@Andy, to combat that lull that tends to occur in the afternoons I just put my less important stuff at those times like catching up on blogs and I do my important work when I’m at my best.

lucia
October 14, 2007

Lucky for me my real job isn’t like that. Anyway, it’s part time (most of the time.) Though, we aren’t sure what’s happening to it over the next month… it’s in a weird phase.

Interwebhunt
October 15, 2007

You could always build a cubicle in your basement to reenact office offensives :)

Karthik
October 15, 2007

lol Caroline, that was very well written! Hilarious, to say the least!


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